Last night I went into my 3-year old son’s room to say goodnight as I do every night. I cover him with his furry little blanket, give him his stuffed animal, and cover him with his bigger blanket. I bend over so he can wrap his arms around me and kiss my cheek as he does every other night. But tonight was different for me. Not because he did anything different or I did, but because of something I was reminded of. As he put those little warm arms around me and softly kissed my cheek, he said the same words he says every night “Mama I love you in the whole earth.” I always love those words, but last night when he said them and looked at me with those big blue eyes, so full of trust in me, so full of love for me, I felt so overwhelmed with love and gratitude. I hadn’t realized how much I had needed to hear and feel that until the tears came without notice. If you could’ve seen me at that moment, you would have understood.
I had oral surgery a few days ago and my cheeks have been throbbing and bruised and swollen for days. My gross hair was up in a pony because I hadn’t showered in days, my shirt had a few stains because I hadn’t gotten to the laundry in days due to the annoying aching in my mouth and I just felt so horribly blah. I know you know what I mean. That blah feeling we all get. The blah feeling that we don’t realize we’re feeling until someone gives us a compliment and we start crying out of the blue, and only then do we realize just how much we needed to hear the kind words.
So there I was, no longer feeling blah because of him. He loves me like this. He completely, absolutely, indefinitely loves me. The real me.Whatever me is at the moment. Whether I’m dressed up or in pajamas. With makeup or without. Hair up or down. Sick or healthy. Swollen and bruised or not. He just does. I already knew my children loved me, but sometimes having those reminders means everything.
And at that moment I also realized just how important it is for me to say kind words to others. Asher didn’t know I was having a blah moment, and that blah feeling is oftentimes virtually impossible to detect in others. So if we scatter sunshine and kindness, there’s a good chance we’re helping someone’s blah day turn into a better day.
So not only did I feel a whole lot better but I was reminded of the importance of sharing kindness and loving words throughout our day because someone out there might really need it. And all because of a teeny, tiny, sweet little 3-year old.